We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

I Think I See The Island

by Flamy Grant

supported by
Mark Manning
Mark Manning thumbnail
nobodaddyo
nobodaddyo thumbnail
Janice Rael
Janice Rael thumbnail
sheishistoric
sheishistoric thumbnail
Karen Elspeth
Karen Elspeth thumbnail
akelavincent
akelavincent thumbnail
djdraeger
djdraeger thumbnail
Eric Strother
Eric Strother thumbnail
llauderdale
llauderdale thumbnail
hilllock
hilllock thumbnail
klessk
klessk thumbnail
/
1.
I Think I See The Island 03:40
lyrics
buy track
The mountains of east county weren’t the first place I’d have chose To hunker down and spend our first years married I suppose But fate and fortune spun the web and since we’re versatile We made a little life out here for a little while From our little yellow house we take the dog and climb the hill At the top is where the sky will open up and I stand still Cause there’s an island thirty miles out to sea and if it’s clear You can just make out her edges when you’re standing over here We go up and we come back down And halfway through we reach the highest ground And search the horizon through the haze I think I see the island today We bundle up most mornings cause that coastal fog rolls in Crawling through the canyons and condensing on our skin Some days we get lucky the island shows herself to us And you never miss a chance to say you see her when she does We go up and we come back down And halfway through we reach the highest ground And search the horizon through the haze I think I see the island today If heaven is just one day we relive eternally I wouldn’t pick our wedding or any anniversary I’d want an arbitrary Thursday when the weather went our way So every morning I could hear you say I think I see it there It’s funny how a habit forms these rituals and rites The holy little moments anchoring our lives Like celebrating when you see an island breaking through And making sure the person that you love has seen it too We go up and we come back down And halfway through we reach the highest ground And search the horizon through the haze I always hold my breath until you say I think I see the island today
2.
That Was All You 03:47
lyrics
buy track
I was out of my mind And out of my body out of my spirit It was a senseless time Maybe love was speaking but I couldn’t hear it I looked and couldn’t find a way To elude the pain that always waiting For me to fall behind So it could paralyze obliviate me I was not myself Maybe I never was I only know that when you found me Was the day that I began  To reclaim the voice that I had lost To start using words I had forgot To unlock the doors that had no key That was all you, baby There was nowhere on earth I felt I could show up as my whole self So you flew us to another galaxy That was all you, baby That was all you That was all you, baby If it were up to me I might still be out there numbing my heartache Another casualty Of a world that makes us learn the hard way It's not safe to be yourself So we pull it back and start behaving  As if we're not free But that cycle breaks when someone's brave and Lets his brilliance shine  Invites a stranger in Rises up in radical belief That we have all we need To reclaim the voices that we lost To start using words we had forgot To unlock the doors that have no key That was all you, baby There was nowhere on earth I felt I could show up as my whole self So you imagined another galaxy That was all you, baby That was all you That was all you, baby That was all you Now we’re on the edge of A life I didn’t expect, love Don’t know where we go next but I know I wanna go with you It feels like I’ve been saved and And people say I’m a changed man But let me just explain and Give credit where it’s due That was all you You helped me find the voice that I had lost And all the words I had forgot You unlocked the doors that have no key That was all you, baby When there was nowhere on earth I felt I could show up as my whole self When a hopeless world was all that I could see You set the course for another galaxy That was all you, baby That was all you That was all you, baby That was all you That was all you, baby That was all you That was all you, baby That was all you

about

A few months ago, my spouse turned to me and said, “Let’s do it. Let’s go to North Carolina.”

For a long time, we had been vacillating between options for the next chapter of our life together. Chicago, Nashville, Vermont, Portland and Bend were all on the table, along with my hometown of Asheville, NC — or simply staying in San Diego.

I once moved halfway across the country for a relationship… to disastrous results. So while my gut was pulling me back toward the southeast, closer to my family and the music scene I felt would suit me best, I was feeling very sensitive to the idea of asking my partner to abandon his life in America’s Finest City and start fresh with me somewhere smaller, greener, and far less politically advantageous.

“Your career is building some real momentum,” Chris said. “It makes sense for us to be where Flamy can thrive. Plus, I’m kind of excited about the idea of exploring the east coast.”

That’s the kind of partner I am lucky enough to have.

I wrote this song for Chris, and am releasing it as a surprise on his birthday — the second time I’ve surprised him with a song (the first was for our wedding weekend and I’ve included it as a bonus track on this release). I’m probably going to have to retire this trick soon and think of other ways to mark special occasions. But with this being his last birthday as a California resident, I wanted to suspend time for a moment the way only music can.

“I Think I See The Island” is about the morning walks we’ve taken to the top of our neighborhood hill over the past 3.5 years. On the rare clear day, you can see the tiny Isla Coronado in the distance, way off the coast of Mexico. At some point, we got into the habit of pointing it out to each other, and this initially made me laugh when I first realized we were doing it.

“We’re becoming one of those couples who say the same things to each other every day,” I chuckled one morning after he’d pointed out the island’s silhouette emerging through the coastal haze.

I imagined us in our seventies shuffling to the top of that hill every morning, peering across the canyons with failing eyes, checking to see if the island would make an appearance today. And rather than feeling predictable or boring, I found the idea very, very comforting. The song came to me in one simple writing session, and I knew I wanted to gift it to Chris as a way to mark this season of our lives — pandemic dog walks; navigating our first years as a married couple in the suburbs; the tiny, recurring thrill of a silly game we played every morning.

To me, it feels holy.

Soon we’ll be searching for new paths to climb with our dog in the Blue Ridge Mountains, and no matter how clear the day, there will be no islands to look for. But new rituals will replace the old, and we’ll invent new things to say to each other every morning.

Still, I hope one day when we’re much older, we’re able to visit our old neighborhood in San Diego, climb to the top of the hill, and see the island that inspired this song.

Happy birthday, Christopher. I’m so grateful for the holy little moments anchoring our lives.

(I owe an extraordinary debt of gratitude to my producer Ben Grace, who brought this entire track to life in a few hours, and to Karyn Thurston, who magicked gorgeous background vocals after listening through approximately twice. Superstars.)

credits

released July 6, 2023

Produced by Ben Grace

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Flamy Grant image

Flamy Grant Asheville, North Carolina

A shame-slaying, hip-swaying drag artist with Appalachian roots. Flamy Grant bring a roots-rock sound influenced by gospel and Americana. Her music shines a spotlight on the queer spiritual journey, telling stories of resilience and recovery from religious trauma.

With a bold lip and a big lash, Flamy is here to rewrite the rules when it comes to religious music. ... more

shows

contact / help

Contact Flamy Grant

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code

Report this album or account

If you like Flamy Grant, you may also like:

Bandcamp Daily  your guide to the world of Bandcamp

On Bandcamp Radio

Seafood Sam joins the show to discuss his newest album, " Standing On Giant Shoulders".
listen now